I was at a party on Saturday night with a friend of mine. I didn't really know anyone there so I sort of ended up floating around from group to group listening to people's conversations and meeting people. I remember sitting in the kitchen and sipping on a beer talking to these two girls I had met once before.

One of the girls had these really red irritated patches of skin on her elbows and knees which her friend noticed and brought up. The girl blushed and whispered, "You know that guy I've been seeing? He picked me up the other day, drove me to this parking lot about 20 minutes from my house, and we had sex in his car. My skin got really irritated from rubbing against the upholstery, cloth seat covers essentially give you rug burn."  Continue reading →

I'm a little bit of a prude, I guess, in that my current boyfriend is my only boyfriend and the only boy I've ever slept with. After a year or so, he started asking me if I would start wearing different lingerie sets for him.

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Before I go to sleep, I usually scroll absentmindedly through my Twitter feed. Last night, a picture someone tweeted really caught my eye. It was one of those black and white, quote pictures, showing a couple holding each other in the forest. Cliché already. In white, the quote read: “You never stop loving someone. You either never did, or you always will.”  Continue reading →

My roommate is working in Chicago this summer. Yesterday, we were Skyping, and she was expressing her concern about one of the girls she hangs out with there. A couple weekends ago, my roommate noticed that the girl, Jill*, snuck off with with a guy at a party. When they came back, they were both flustered and giggling. Everyone knew something had happened. The next day, Jill gave a very detailed account of what had happened with the guy. As my roommate tilted her head and gave her an odd look, Jill replied, "But wait, you don't think that's cheating, do you?" Continue reading →

Last year, Jessica Valenti (the founder of Feministing) visited my campus. I’d never heard of her before, and I must admit, I primarily attended the event to get bonus points for one of my classes. As soon as she began speaking, I realized that this was not a run-of-the-mill guest lecture. I was immediately intrigued. 

Valenti mostly discussed rape culture, but she also mentioned something called the virgin/whore dichotomy. According to this dichotomy, a woman is either seen as a virgin or a whore, and her value and worth are adjusted accordingly. Continue reading →

Last night, I got a text from my friend, Halle*. It was a text I had gotten about once every four weeks since summer started. Around the same time she was reunited with her long-distance boyfriend. Around the same time she stopped using her birth control. The text read, in all caps, "NOT PREGNANT WAHOOOO."  Continue reading →

I have a friend who I've known since early high school and have always had a crush on him. Even now, 13 years later, I still secretly like the guy. I have always contemplated on whether to confess these feelings to him, or continue to remain silent. One main reason for my contemplation is because I didn't know if it would be right to tell someone who already has a girlfriend that you like them. He is currently dating this girl I know, but their relationship has been off and on. Continue reading →

A few years ago, I received an email that changed my life. It was from some administrative woman at my university, and it said that, for my major, I had surpassed the credit cap for the campus I was attending. I had to transfer to another campus – one that was three hours away – immediately. I thought about my girlfriend, and wondered what this news would mean for us. We would either have to try to make a long-distance relationship work, or we would have to move in together. Continue reading →

I don't know when to ask my boyfriend to go on a family vacation, because we've only been dating for three and a half weeks now. My family's going on a trip to Missouri in August, and I know by that time we will have been together for exactly two months. I don't want to scare him off by asking him too early in the relationship and I don't want to make it seem like we're moving too fast by going to see my dad's side of the family. Continue reading →

One of my friends has a beyond controlling boyfriend and I have no idea how to help her. He always plays the "innocent" card. He always guilts her into doing things, makes her feel bad about herself, and blames her for the things that are his fault. She moved to another country for a year for this guy. He cheated on her a year ago (he also has a history of cheating on his ex girlfriends) and any time she tries talking about it, he turns everything around on her and yells at her for making him feel "attacked."  Continue reading →